So recently the community manager for Dollar Shave Club, a fun new razor subscription service, emailed me with a rather vague question…just how do I shave time and money off tedious parts of my schedule every day? Well as regular readers will already be aware, I am like a well-oiled machine when it comes to schedules – a Mrs. Trunchbull type when it comes to travel plans! That is why nothing ever goes wrong, and I never have any hapless stories of misfortune to share with you all…
Awkward tumbleweed rolls by…
Anyway, with that said, I did think of a couple of pointers I could give you guys – there’s the obvious: which is NEVER to change currency at the terminal! Either do it beforehand, or wait until you get into the city for a more favorable exchange rate, (they quite literally pull your eyes out and slap you with them at the airport!) If you must, then only change a small amount, enough for the taxi ride to the hotel perhaps, and maybe a sandwich, oh and a coffee, oh and a…yeah, errr, I never really follow my own advice.
I did read somewhere that if you are looking for last minute cheap flights, then Tuesday afternoon is the best time for it – something about busy business guy types cancelling last minute – so the airline just wants to get bums on seats rather than completely missing out on money! Makes sense. So take advantage of this!
I also heard that online flight booking sites are absolute cookie monsters…as in they take all your cookies and refuse to share them, even if you start crying and tell your Mammy – they couldn’t care less, or something along those lines…no, wait, that’s not right. I actually don’t think it has anything to do with Sesame Street…oh…ah yes, I remember! So they store all the information about you, so that when you return they give you a more expensive flight than you would have got as a first time user! Pffft, that’s gratitude for ya! To get around this is relatively simple though; remove cookies, or go incognito on Chrome and you should be good to go! This is probably true for their respective apps, which is a major bummer as they do make things a lot more convenient!
Maybe I will write them a disgruntled note…
Dear Skyscammer,
Give me back my cookies, I am starving over here! I don’t think it is fair in the slightest, you will be off my Christmas card list if you continue in this manner! You can have your cookies and I can have mine, keep your greedy paws off my chocolate chips.
Yours sincerely,
John (pissed off, and still vaguely confused customer)
With all that said, I actually think the most impressive way in which I shave time is this…shhh…it’s actually a secret…but, well. I time travel. YES, LIKE DOCTOR WHO! Well, kind of. I mean…okay, granted I am not a time lord, and instead of a tardis more often than not I have an economy flight on a sweaty plane…but still, it’s basically the same thing.
I TRAVEL THROUGH TIME WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT?!?!?!
Here’s an example from the present day: I am set to leave Nepal at 9:00am(ish) on the 16th and will spend 16 amount of hours getting to England, but will still arrive at only 21:00pm(ish) on the same day! So why am I not getting a hit TV show and action figurines made in my likeness?
Well probably because the jet lag knocks me for two days afterwards…I have been known to fall asleep in the bath, in my soup, or whilst walking up the stairs…and I always tend to have dark teabag sized pouches under my eyes for a week after the ordeal…no kid would want to play with that toy.
Now that I think of it, this probably shaves time off my life…as in I will not live to see the later years…hmm, shame. I was looking forward to a diet of Werther’s Originals…and attaching balloons to my house – so I could forgo dealing with the horrid airport situation.
So okay, I’m not much help. But what about you? Any pearls of wisdom?
Like this story? Then why not like the Facebook page? http://www.facebook.com/storytimewithjohn YOU KNOW IT MAKES SENSE!
John Lee Taggart 
Leave a comment