A Smelly Trump

Something strange is happening in American politics, something that seems to go against all reason and common sense…it’s being dubbed as “The Trump Surge” – which is just as handy as there are many similarities between Donald Trump and flatulence; namely that they are both entirely unwanted but still stink up a room whenever they’re introduced.

But although the old beaver-flap haired fella is awful, his apparent popularity says more about the climate of discontent than it does about the man himself…I mean if people are giving him a pass how bad must the other guys be in comparison, right? You see the problem with Donald Trump is simple and clear – it’s Donald Trump. But for the most part the other contenders come off as career politicians who are in it for themselves, and consequently cannot be trusted…they’ll back any cause, or make any promises just to get votes…all in the hope that they can repay the donations from billionaire elites with hushed deals and secret handshakes once in office – after all it is those figures who hold the true (and very scary) global power.

Scary Business GIF

So consequently as people become more aware of how strong a grip banks and big business possess they are gravitating away from the typical slick snake-tongued politicians and towards average-Joe ‘truth tellers’; by which I mean people who they feel represent themselves and tell it like it is, rather than just saying what they think the electorate want to hear. The same can be said about the rise of Jeremy Corbyn within the realms of British politics, who is seeking to completely flip the miserable script of austerity in the hope of something new for the UK – and although he is not everyone’s cup of tea, he has gained support in unprecedented numbers, especially among the young and disenfranchised…all because people consider him to be not just another lizard robot politician-puppet.

(Little side-note…haven’t you wondered why world leaders take so many holidays? Well it’s because they’re cold-blooded and NEED to bask in the sun for warmth. And again, have you ever witnessed David Cameron, or Barack Obama eat flies? No you haven’t – and why is that? Because they’re ultra-careful not to be caught so people don’t find out the hideous reptilian truth! OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE! THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE!)

Tin Foil Hat GIF

Ahem, anyway…what we have with Trump is hardly comparable to Corbyn (I was trying to be nice, and balanced – but screw it), you see instead of good common sense we have a typical offensive uncle-type spouting bigotry at whatever function he has been invited to. Except it’s not just your cousin’s wedding reception this time around…it’s the world, the global stage, and literally everyone has to hear all he has to say. Whether it be about Mexican immigrants being murderers and rapists, or women and their menstrual cycles, there is no topic that is off limits – so it’s less of a case of ‘I wonder if he will say anything controversial?’ and more just ‘what will he come out with this time?’ Because where other candidates would tip-toe Trump stomps through with enormous muddy boots on…not giving any real consideration or care about whatever vile babble comes out of his mouth, or who he tramples all over in his seemingly self-destructive speeches.

But despite this rather heinous resume of public speaking hiccups Trump still has everything to gain and nothing to lose. He won’t win, he won’t ever become president…but as strange as it sounds that’s not really his aim. He is joining the likes of Sarah Palin, and Hermain Cain who are simply using the process as a platform for attention and have no intention of ever getting into office – largely because they are not running out of political desperation but out of an ego-maniacal attempt to boost their own image and brand. (All funded by gullible people’s donations may I add.)

Sarah Palin GIF

However the fact that his ridiculous pantomime of a candidacy appears to be gaining steam and momentum remains really quite worrying – as it suggests a large section of the Republican party are so desperate for someone who isn’t Barack Obama that they feel only an extreme right wing political zealot will suffice…that someone who is deliberately oblivious to obvious problems is the man for the job…that a person who would openly suggest he feels the US police need more power in the wake of such overbearingly horrendous examples of corruption and terror is a person who should be an actual potential president of the United States of America…

…it’s bonkers to me, but what this whole charade unveils for me is one truth; that not all Republicans are racists – but most racists are Republican.



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Published by Storytime with John

Writer/Humorist/Comms Dude

35 thoughts on “A Smelly Trump

  1. There are people who believe that Trump’s presence in the preliminary campaign is just a ploy to make the other candidates look better by comparison.

    Unfortunately, American politics (and politics everywhere, I’d imagine) has just become a bid for the lesser of two evils. I’ve never gone into a voting booth in my life thinking, “Who will do the most good?” Only ever, “Who will do the least damage?”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes absolutely, it’s hard to be enthusiastic about those which are clearly just in it for all the wrong reasons…willing to be paid off and bribed from the very outset – how can anyone trust them to make any real decisions for the people when the system is so crooked? Urgh…


  2. Donald’s empire would fall apart with him in office. Talk about a pay cut… This election will be another train wreck with the winner sucking the least. (And spending the most)

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well said, non-American John!! Sometimes it takes an outsider’s eye to see things so clearly. Loved this line (and I plan to steal it — with attribution, of course): “. . . similarities between Donald Trump and flatulence; namely that they are both entirely unwanted but still stink up a room whenever they’re introduced.”

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I like what you have to say for the most part.:) You seem to see Obama for what he is, heck all politicians. I will admit that Trump is not the wisest in what he says, but since when is being anti-illegal immigrant racist? I don’t want illegal immigrants here. I have family friends who are here from Pakistan and had to jump through hoops for years to become full citizens. Now that they have citizenship, they want to bring over family because of all of the dangers in their daily living. Why should someone be able to come over the Mexican border and just be able to skip the whole process? Does that make me racist? I hope the hell not because I married a guy from the Caribbean who is very dark and my offspring is not fully white.

    I am conservative fiscally though. I think so many people are sick of the way that Obama has spent money endlessly and that is where Trump is the answer because like you said we don’t want another career politician. I sure as heck don’t . I don’t want a Clinton or a Bush in the White House again! Time for change, and though I am not certain Trump is the answer, I can’t think of many who I trust to manage our finances and international relations, something is good at. It is tough for an independent like me, because I am very conservative when it comes to money and constitutional issues, yet liberal when it comes to people doing what they want with their lives.

    I just pray we have a real leader again. Someone with guts. Someone who is not so politically correct that they are not afraid to admit that there is a terrorist problem. A huge one. Someone who doesn’t have a wife holding up signs to save people on Twitter. Someone who is actually saving people for real. Out of everyone running, I just don’t quite see that person in anyone. I am ready for the crazies to attack after what I had to say, but I don’t care. The truth is the truth, and as far as I can tell this is still a free country. At least for now…

    Good post! Even though I don’t agree with you fully, I love your writing style and get your points…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey there, great response! My view on this is that Trump has something to always fall back on when the going gets tough…tough because of the messed up things he says. You see he can broach an issue without stereotyping a whole people negatively, but he chooses not to – why? Well for shock value to get more media attention! And then when people complain about this he can just say “ohh you are being too politically correct!” Well TRUST ME I have had complaints of that sort on this site despite the fact I am not trying to offend a soul, and that can be annoying – but he is going out of his way to do this INTENTIONALLY.

      So no, you’re not racist for wanting stricter controls on illegal immigration, haha – so don’t worry about that, you know who you are and what you stand for. BUT Donald Trump is for stating that EVERY SINGLE Mexican immigrant is a rapist and murderer. I’m sure you see the difference between you (a nice person I’m sure), and Trump who has just type-cast a whole set of people. Anyway, I’ve rambled enough – sorry for my late response wanted to sit down and really type out a deserving reply rather than a few lines, as I appreciated your side of it!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so much. I get your point. He has never been my favorite, my any means, but I feel like he would be a good leader because he has experience. It is so sad that I am never “gung-ho” about any candidate over the last decade and I feel that I am always choosing the lesser of 2 evils. LITERALLY.:) Thanks for your awesome blog!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. He is certainly stirring up all the bullshit in Washington….you have to give him a little pass for being the only one in a long time to call out the old fucks, sorry I starting to rant, for what they are and are hiding behind….however the DON does go way over the top…..but we are enjoying the show….love to watch Politian’s squirm….regardless of the party…

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m supporting Bernie Sanders. I’ll vote for whoever gets the democratic nom over any Republican, but Bernie is the only candidate who understands the true problems and has spent his entire political career working to address them. Not a mealy mouthed panderer like so many pols.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’ve been disturbed by Trump’s candidacy. It’s true that a democracy will occasionally go in for a novelty act — see Ross Perot’s 1992 run, or Jessie Ventura as governor of Minnesota a few years back; for that matter, there was a short while in 19th Century France when a fantastically negligible character named Georges Boulanger was seen as the One Hope For La Republique. And being loud and obnoxious sounds enough like being stalwart and honest that people go for it, at least for a while; Chris Christie rode that into a governorship. For the most part, the novelty acts dissipate without doing permanent damage, and obnoxious gets seen after a few years as just obnoxiousness.

    But sometimes there’s a pathological case and serious, lasting harm can be done. Right now I’m afraid the United States will be lucky if it can get out of this without worse than what McCarthyism did to the nation.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh Joseph you’re very smart, I don’t have such a lengthy knowledge of previous candidates and global politics – so thank you for the education! You’re totally correct in what you say from what I can see, and I hope it turns out to be true as such blatant controversy fuelled politics can never serve all people – it will satisfy a few niche radical qualms but then what about day-to-day issues, real life…people like Trump don’t seem to have these answers, or even care to discuss them. Probably because they don’t have knowledge of a life even closely related to the people they seek to represent.


  8. This whole thing has turned into a nightmare! It’s terrifying that THAT many people still support him even after he said all those ignorant, racist, sexist comments! It says a lot about what’s happening in USA 😦 Love this post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s very scary, and there are similar things coming to light in the UK as well as other countries across the world…it’s quite sad actually. I know people are disenfranchised with the political status quo – but surely Trump is not the answer 😦


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