Awkward Introduction

Trying to come up with a decent/stupid introduction for the upcoming collection…how does this sound? I know it’s silly, but still…

The Awkward Introduction:

Hello. Hi…hiya? No, hiya is definitely a bit too much. Hello! If it’s alright with you, then I will make this brief. Because I do feel quite strongly that I am making somewhat of a buffoon of myself in this introduction…I would have loved to have just leapt straight into the travel tales, and skipped past all of this. But then you may have been all; “who even is this guy? And why is he so rude a bastard, that he doesn’t even say hello – or introduce himself?! He is well and truly off the Christmas card list!”

Well point taken. Albeit from an imagined, and probably a lot scarier version of yourself.

My name is John. John Lee Taggart. And although that may be a little reminiscent of the classic James Bond line, I couldn’t be further from the character himself. Well I could. I mean I do have a face, and hands, and legs, and other matching body parts – but I mean to say, I am no action hero, or suave lady-killer. Or bad-guy killer. Actually I don’t even kill flies, I’m pathetic…or nice, depending on your outlook.

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What I do like to do though, is live life – and laugh at things. Both are pretty much involuntary, but I enjoy that they happen all the same. So on that note here are a little collection of travel tales from The Global Fool himself – little old me.

I hope you enjoy them. Please don’t throw stones if you don’t. (That’s not a metaphor – I mean like literal stones – they hurt a lot.)

Yours…sincerely? Faithfully? Errr…I never really know…so erm. Bye!

Love John

Also…what’s the deal with Amazon, and charity – as in, is there an option for the profits to go to a charity, or would I have to take it, and give it myself? Is that a stupid question? Errr…you see, as the stories will literally just be a collection of selected ones from the site, I feel it would be nice for it to go to a good cause. Not that I don’t like money, but still.

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Please buy my collection of stories! Get it in paperback here – or on Kindle here! ALL proceeds go towards Macmillan Cancer Support!