The Embassy Strikes Back: The Return of the Passport.

This is a travel tale…but with a difference – this time it won’t be about my own adventures…instead it’s about a close personal friend of mine, he has saw me through some tough times, and has been with me through thick and thin – he’s a travel companion of sorts, who has recently had his own first solo voyage.

I’m talking of course, about my passport.



You see my passport finally returned to me yesterday, it was such a joyous moment – filled with laughter and happiness! When I first saw it I just stared at it in disbelief…it’d been so long…but it almost felt like we had never parted – then I snapped out of this romantic daydream, and remembered the NIGHTMARE that has been the last couple of months…


This is the trail that my passport has been on – the locations will probably make some people jealous…but, please see past that if possible, and realize the torment and sheer hell my poor passport has really been through…

  1. So firstly, upon direct request of the Indian embassy in South Korea, my passport jetted off (at great expense) to London for a little spot of sightseeing! It was a little pissed off initially, as it had wanted to stay in Korea with me…but once it became mandatory it decided to make the most of it!
  2. Next, in a bizarre turn of events, the Indian embassy in London told my passport that it wouldn’t be granted a visa for India…that we should have organized it in Korea instead…this really put a dampener on things…it still tried all the tourist stuff anyway, but just couldn’t enjoy it…it didn’t even crack a smile on the London Eye! To make matters worse there was no refund, and it was told that it wouldn’t be able to fly back home to reunite with its nearest and dearest.
  3. I tried everything I could to get it back…I sent email after email, I called, and called, and called…any reply was few and far between, and always, ALWAYS cryptically moronic. That’s giving them way too much credit – as the service was actually straight fucking garbage; I have had more fruitful conversations with grave stones, at least they don…ahem…sorry, I was trying to keep this light hearted…so yeah my passport…
  4. The passport was stranded, still. After months of wrangling, and payment after payment that seemed to do nothing, (in my mind the whole office went out for spa days using my cash, and that is why they didn’t ever answer the phone! They were just so damned relaxed!) I finally SNAPPED. I needed my friend with me, I missed it – we were always together, you could say we were in each other’s pockets…the sense of loneliness was horrendous…I wanted to feel its body next to mine. I decided to pay WHATEVER it takes to make this happen.
  5. So I got DHL involved…and guess what? It even took them AGES to get a hold of the embassy to arrange pick up, as again they never answered the phone! (The whole office probably went out for full body massages…) But EVENTUALLY DHL came to the rescue…and we were reunited in Korea at long last. Phew. Close call…we have a holiday booked up in a week’s time!

I don’t even want to do the mathematics of how expensive it was for me to effectively give my passport to someone and have they give me it back with NOTHING AT ALL changed. I feel like anyone would happily jump at the chance to make money from doing absolutely fuck all…in fact it is a fantastic way to make money, I can’t even pretend it isn’t – what a wonderful system! Obviously there are cons…such as selling your soul to the devil, and effectively being an absolute fucking scoundrel…a lying and robbing cheating scumbag if you will– but hey, that’s basically every job, right? RIGHT?!

So change of plans, my passport and I are off to Nepal on Monday, they have an on arrival visa system which seems pretty straight forward – after this whole ordeal we are SO ready for some rest and recuperation…tales will follow no doubt!

Anyway, this will probably be the last story I will write for a little while – I can’t imagine that I will find much time up in the Himalayas to whip out my laptop and start typing away…and if I do somehow find space, I would further doubt that there would be WIFI!

So just a few little announcements while I am here!

After two months Storytime with John is doing wonderfully,in my humble opinion – I am very pleased, I have over 2,000 followers and I’ve got almost 30,000 views…I have absolutely no fucking idea if that is ‘good’ or not – but for a small town boy like me, it is nothing short of amazing. So thank you! Thank you for your continued readership and support! I always think ‘follower’ sounds a little weird…like kind of religion(ish), or at the very least cult(ish)…do my followers actually follow me? Like into battle or whatever? For example if I wanted to lay siege to the Indian embassy in London…you’d all be with me, right?

Well, I digress…I have one more news piece, that a couple of you are aware of – I had some rather interesting meetings as of late – with a comic book producer…long story short, he is interested in possibly launching a new comic based on Storytime with John – very exciting stuff! I’ll keep you posted on that…I don’t want to give too much away…

Stay out of trouble while I am gone my friends, you’ll hear from me soon!

Love John x


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44 Replies to “The Embassy Strikes Back: The Return of the Passport.”

  1. Yay first to congratulate you on the comic book! What an amazing tale of love of your passport, it oozes with romance and I’m glad you two were again reunited. Have a wonderful trip, climb a few for me. Just started following..yeah I know yesterday, but enjoying what I’m reading. Take Safe, look forward to your travel adventures on your return.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ahhhhh! Nepal? I’m backpacking through north India (Himachel Pradesh/ Rajasthan) and Nepal next summer! So jealous, be safe, take heaps of pictures and please update when you can so I can feed my craving of traveling tales until I have some of my own next summer. 🙂


    1. I am jealous of your India trip – I will try again next year with the whole visa process…maybe I will be older and wiser? …probably not, haha!

      But yes, Nepal – I have heard GREAT things, I will let you know how it all turns out! 🙂


      1. Hahahaha, perhaps if your wanderlust self ends up in India next year we can meet up! 🙂 Until then, the Himalayas in Nepal is life changing and is to die for, so I’ve heard, enjoy. 🙂 Cheers to traveling.


  3. I know all about a missing passport. The wait is brutal. Congrats on the safe return and the comic. And your blog, John.


      1. Hopefully I’ll still be writing it! I tend to quit my blogs every time I start them. But I am hoping this one goes the distance. And it would be cool if you kept reading. I’ll keep following yours as well.


      2. haha, well hopefully you stick with it! I have considered a move to the middle east in the past so your personal tales about it have shed a lot of light…basically I’m saying don’t stop now brother!

        Oh and thanks! 🙂


  4. Have a marvellous trip. Take great care of the passport.
    And, hell, yeah, if you ever want to storm the Indian embassy in London I’m there! In fact, I’m more than happy to undertake the spa recce to locate all staff. Any and all spas in the vicinity. I’ll keep a low profile in the jacuzzi and steam rooms. Just give the nod.


  5. Love your story!! Keep it up! Believe me, this is summer so it’s actually a much better idea to go to Nepal and stay in mountains than travel in India, so! you made (or maybe forced to make, ha) the wise choice!


  6. Congratulations on the comic book deal!! Very exciting 🙂
    Glad to hear you have been reunited with your passport. I know it must have been frustrating but you provided a very entertaining story!
    Kudos also on your blog – I am a follower but I have to respectfully decline helping you lay siege to the Indian Embassy in London (LOL) Safe travels!!


    1. Thank you, we shall see how it goes, very exciting at this point though!

      Gahhhh why did I think that followers would just blindly follow me into battle? I miss the middle ages…I really do, haha!

      Appreciate your kind words, take care of yourself and we’ll speak soon!


  7. We will be waiting …hoping you’ll be able to find the time (and an internetconnection) to post once in a while
    Safe travels and enjoy!


  8. You absolute legend, my friend is my diary actually. Can’t wait to see your comic, this is exciting stuff. I’d definitely go back to my hometown of London with you, and the guys to lay siege. Wish I could travel as much as you, you can always write a “new post” telepathically with a friend at home to press the realistic “publish” button ^.^ Have a great time, can’t wait to hear all about it. You will of course tell us 😀


  9. Congratulations on getting your passport back! Finally! Oh yeah, on the comic book too 😀 That’s awesome news! Wow! You’re going places and I am insanely jealous! Anyway, on the ‘being nice’ front… have a wonderfully amazing trip to Nepal and keep the posts coming. Travel safe 🙂


  10. Just started reading your blog and really like it.
    It’s very funny and real, if you know what I mean 🙂
    Hope your having fun on your trip!
    If you ever intend on going to Iceland let me know, am from there and could give you tips and even get you in touch with some people over there 🙂
    ….and of course if you’d come to sunny Bahrain 🙂


  11. Hmmm, I don’t have a passport, and if it will travel more than I, perhaps I should just stay Stateside and read your blog. Seems less exhausting and expensive 🙂


  12. Your poor passport. I’m glad you have it back, and in time for your next great adventure. I’d ask you to share your secret on getting that many people interested in what I write, but I think I have an idea on how to do that. I hope things in India are going well, and can’t wait to hear more from you. 🙂


  13. Congratulations. Losing my passport was pretty much my deepest fear while I was living overseas, but I only managed to lose it when I was at home and had nowhere to go.


  14. Congrat´s John, a comic book based on your tales, didn´t surprise me that you would get published. This is some funny things, you have a natural talent to write funny. Glad for you my man. Enjoy your trip to India or Nepal….not very good with geography if one is part of the other next to each other or what not. Have a good adventure. I´m sure readers will like to hear some story of your next trip.


  15. I have been reading your posts since Kids make me sick. You are talented, funny, and show the story. Congrats on the comic book proposal and sorry about your Passport issue. I can’t wait for you write again. Check out my work if you get a chance.

    hugs from a fan,


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