Tricky Decisions

There are often tough decisions we have to make in life – some of them are major heart-wrenching numbers, you know; should I move abroad to look for work? Should I go back to school? Do I really need extra cheese on this XL pizza? 

But occasionally these choices demand an instant response, and can’t be deliberated – the choice is a split-second one…and in this moment your brain spins into total chaos attempting to pick out the least offensive best fit ~

Fresh GIF

That happened to me a few hours ago…in a frenetic snapshot that lasted only a few seconds. You see I was innocently on my jolly old way to the supermarket at about 3:00pm – so I could beat the lines, and get it all over with before I had sniffling school children, and their beleaguered parents wrestling with me for the last on sale pork chop. No siree – not today! 

I was moments away, when a silver blacked out car pulled in. I thought maybe it was the Korean version of The Men in Black, who would drag me in – question me, and then realise I am a complete dunce – and return me to my average activities. But it wasn’t. It was actually a family car, as out hopped a little girl (maybe eight/nine?) who went fleeing off into a nearby building with an excitable spring in her step…

That’s when I noticed she had dropped one of her gloves in her hurry…and was faced with a tricky split-second decision…

Which was of course exacerbated by the fact that I am limited in my grasp of the Korean language…I mean, I certainly don’t know how to say:

“hey excuse me, you dropped your glove! I’m not a creepy weirdo – this isn’t stranger danger, this is stranger…help…err…ing!”

So, my only real option was to pick the glove up, and go running after the girl in silence…like some insane modern-day child catcher…but yeah I immediately figured that’s not a good look – imagine if you dropped your child off, and you immediately witness a strange looking man sprinting as fast as his chubby thighs will carry him, in the direction of your now heavily freaked out daughter…you would probably be a little alarmed? Possibly a smidge concerned at the very least?

Nervous GIF

My brain picked up on that thankfully, so high five brain! Anyway I had deliberated too long so my target had escaped…not target John…erm…mark? No…well yeah, she was safe, and sound in the building is my point. So I picked up the glove, and went over to the car…

Again – I couldn’t just knock on the window, and say “Excuse me there! Your daughter appears to have dropped her glove! Oh, what a to-do! There you are! Have a good day now!” Or whatever people in England say to each other, I can’t recall for sure – it’s been a while. So instead my brain had the bright idea of just opening the door, and throwing it in. The windows were blacked out, so it’s not like I would have to have awkward eye contact…

…well the car was pulling away, so it was now or never…I tried to bypass the possibly terrible idea, but I couldn’t think of anything else. I’m one of those odd people who would worry about this whole situation not meeting a nice resolution, if I don’t act. I’d be kept awake at night crying over someone’s glove, and what should have happened…I like a happy ending you know? Every glove should stay with their soul mate. 

Soul mate GIF

So that’s what I went with. It was probably the better of two evils – I know that people probably don’t like some random guy opening their car door without permission, probably would be quite a scary moment..what does he want?! Is he going to steal my car?! Try to kill me?! Is he selling something?! OH MY GOD – is he an extremist Jehovah’s Witness?! Maybe this is what they do now!?

Well as I said I didn’t have to deal with eye contact. I just opened it a little, murmured something which I couldn’t even hear through my blaring earphones, threw it in, and then slammed the door – before walking off hastily. I didn’t look back, the car could have blown up for all I know.

But the important thing is that at least it wasn’t on my mind, festering away for years. And the gloves were reunited…wait…perhaps it was a taxi?! That would explain the blacked out windows…OH GOD, I AM GOING TO BE THINKING ABOUT THIS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!!! ARGHHHH!!!


Please buy my collection of stories! Get it in paperback here – or on Kindle here! ALL proceeds go towards Macmillan Cancer Support!

Hot Wheels!

We made wooden cars in class the other day…and as we all know, science-backed scientific research has proven flame designs make any car go faster. So obviously mine was the fastest.

Flame Car

Aaron’s really got the mean-mug look down!


That’s everyone’s aim right…no? Oh, well perhaps not – but if it is your aim then maybe you would do well to watch this video – so that you can see how NOT to do it!  What we have here are Korean compensation scam artists caught in the act! What ensues is just all out ridiculousness…

Courtesy of The Korea Observer ~

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