I’ve been asked to provide five possible short stories, which display language errors – for a Korean made English language book – I suppose the aim is to point out possible mistakes that could be made, so that English learners don’t have to make them personally! Anyway, I have to get them done by Sunday! Phew, that’s a lot of work! So yeah, rough and ready; here is the 1st of 5:
Every once in a while, as Korean work culture dictates – the boss will take all of his employees out for a staff dinner. The set menu of this occasion is usually something like; meal, drinks, more drinking, karaoke, more drinking, then slump back to bed wishing you hadn’t had those last few soju shots. It’s a well established formula, and always makes for gossip fueled dramas, as well as silly memories among your work colleagues. Some people dread it, some people love it.
What I wasn’t expecting to be offered was…errr…something other than food, alcohol, and the microphone…I mean I certainly wasn’t expecting to be offered “a cock”.
You see there I was…happily chowing down on some grilled meat, and vegetables – when my boss leaned in to my ear – and whispered…“would you like – a cock?” Erm. Errr…well, I was frozen to the spot. I didn’t know what to say – no one wants to be rude to their boss, especially in Korea that is a big no-no! So I asked him to repeat his question…maybe I had misheard?
“Would you like a cock?”
No. I hadn’t misheard – that is most definitely what he had said – I looked around for someone, anyone to save me…thankfully I noticed the waiter next to me, and worked out that he actually meant to say Coke, as in Coca Cola!
“Oh, yes!” I replied – “One cock, please!”
John Lee Taggart 
Great story! Thanks for for a great laugh! G-uno
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This story would make a humorous and entertaining addition to the book. I say, use it. By the way, did you heartily suck that “cock” down?
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hahaha, fortunately it didn’t have to come to that AC!
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Hmm… don’t ever recall eating a boy chicken. I guess it couldn’t hurt.
Neither could Coca Cola.
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I had numerous students from jordan to bangladesh, and many of them had big problems with “th”.
“first” and “second” were ok, but a quick jump to “fourth” would have avoided some raised eyebrows.
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Bwahahaha! You just made cock spew from my nose. I mean coke…
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😉
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Love it. How cultures collide… Awkward.
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haha! Very awkward indeed! 😀
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Oooops… That would be something for my “I can English” feature…
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haha, it certainly would!
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I might link it to it, if you don’t mind?
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Not at all! I’d be honored.
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Damn 😀 is this a real incident..
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Yes! And I’ve heard from others that it’s quite a common mistake!
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😀 Im imagining what if you hadn’t noticed the waiter.. 😀
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Awkwardness…just total awkwardness!
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It reminds me of some of the problems I’ve had trying to learn Czech. I have probably as many stories of me messing up in their language as I do of them messing up in English. 🙂
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lol I used to eat at an Indian restaurant some years back (it’s closed down now) and the Indian barman always used to say ‘cock’ instead of coke’! I swear it’s true! Was hilarious :-p
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hahaha! Is that why it closed down? 😉
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lol no ;p
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haha, well that’s good to know – may be a little unsanitary!
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Spot-on ;p I never noticed anything myself… but, who knows? Maybe those were not really chickens I was eating!
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Ha ha!! Talking about ‘cock’ and language learning, in school, with 5/6 year olds, we were making senses cubes. The kids had to draw something they liked to do with each sense, like, ‘I like to feel…’, ‘I like to hear…’ I got two ‘I like to taste ‘cock’!!! (Coke!!😝). Erm…. Cue uncomfortable teacher looks!!!
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hahaha! I can picture it now! 😀
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I think there were actually 2… I do believe I have pictures somewhere…! 😁
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Haha! I always call coke cock, i say to my boyfriend “want some cock?” And his face is priceless everytime, he wants to say yes but he has that funny ‘i’m not quite sure what to say’ look on his face lol
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hahahah! Class! 😀
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He goes “i’ll have a glass of coke please” and i’m like “shut up and drink my cock!” Its just so funny!
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hahaha crackin up 😀
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I just imagine myself as the Fry meme!
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Would you like to supersize that sir?
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Funniest comment goes to you! haha!
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OMG that’s so hilarious – I’m dying!!! I’m moving to South Korea to teach English in August… pretty sure I’ll have a six pack from laughing so much by the time I’m done 😀
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Wow Rozanne! That’s great! You’ll love it! Where are you placed?
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Not sure yet… probably Busan 🙂 . I was kinda hoping for Daegu – but I heard they are limiting intakes there…? But for now I have no idea 😀 I don’t really mind though to be honest – I’m just looking forward to the adventure, and I guess I’ll do a lot of traveling anyway. Where are you placed?
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Ah excellent! Well I’m In Suwon, it’s about 40 mins outside of Seoul. You’re gonna love it wherever you end up! 🙂
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Hahaha, I understand your state of shock!
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haha! It was an unnerving one…phew!
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😃
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Hilarious 😀
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Thank you! Happy you got a kick out of it!
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Heheheh thank you for it 🙂
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Absolutely no comment, however witty, could out do that tale… splendidly jovial start to my midday. 🙂
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Glad you enjoyed it! A little blue but yeah never mind 🙂
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Good for a giggle – which is always fresh. I thought it was pretty tasteful actually 😀
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You thought you were going to get more than you bargained for thee John! Ha Ha!!
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hahaha! Yes indeed, certainly wasn’t in the job description!
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haha hahaha
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😉
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Now I really had no idea how that story would end – Cock for Coke I love it.
A while back the Coke commercial was musical and ended with have a Coke and a smile. I am imagining it Korean-style lol.
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hahahaha yeah they’d only be able to play it after 10pm!
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Reblogged this on Author S B Mazing and commented:
Saw this yesterday while reading all your posts in my reader and thought it would be a great addition to my “I Can English Wednesday” Blog Event. For all of you interested: It is all about little mistakes in the English language and some funny moments coming out of it… Do you have a story to tell? Let me know or simply link it to the “I Can English Wednesday” page here on my blog.
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Appreciate the reblog 🙂
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Wrong blog… will do it again from the other one 😉
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Reblogged this on A Momma's View and commented:
Saw this yesterday while reading through your posts in my reader. Thought it would be a good addition to my “I Can English Wednesday” Blog Event. If you have a funny story to tell about an English word in a different way and that leading to a funny situation, let me know or simply link it to the “I Can English Wednesday” page on my blog.
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Oh my that is a really big oopsie and good for you for ordering a cock instead of a coke as I can imagine that it would be rude to correct a mistake like that to your boss. Lets hope he doesn’t read your blog!
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hahaha! Yes here’s to hoping! And you’re right, culture dictates I can’t “act out of line” in that respect!
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When you hear a typical Gujrati say, “Snakes are waiting for you on the table,” don’t get terrified. What he means is “Snacks are waiting for you on the table.”
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Oh wow! hahaha! That’s funny, I’ll make a note of that 😉
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Hahaaaa! That happens where I am too – in Thailand! Have you heard of “talk cock”. Your story reminds me of that – it’s an expression Singaporeans use, to imply that it’s rubbish or nonsense. We also “Singlish-fy” it by saying “you talking cock”. And one that never fail to baffle foreigners.:)
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