Tag: strange

The Dadbod Myth

Okay internet, we have to talk…and I think you know why… The fabled “Dadbod” thing that seems to be doing the rounds recently…apparently it’s the new hot thing? That every woman cannot resist? Is…this…like, are you actually for real though? You mean to say that suddenly those Grecian demi-god types, those sculpted walking statues, those action figurine…

May 18, 2015

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A Suffocating Child

I remember seeing the little warning notes on plastic carrier bags as a kid…something along the lines of ‘To avoid danger of suffocation, keep away from babies and children!’ And like most people (I imagine) I thought “DURRRRRRRRRR! Why must people constantly be told what is glaringly obvious?!” Well…hmmm…about that one… Today I wandered into a classroom to be…

May 13, 2015

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Cockroach Crisis

How are you supposed to deal with an incoming attack?! Probably not kicking and screaming? Well…yeah sure…that actually makes sense. Listen…I know I am technically a grown man and all that kind of jazz (I’m not but the government forms tell me I am)…but cockroaches freak me out. Am I the only one? I mean…

May 9, 2015

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The Sandwich Day

We are often told by Hallmark card sentimentalists that “life is a rollercoaster”, and that “there are ups and downs”, and whatever else they bother to print. Which may or may not be true, but that’s not the point I’m making. Instead I am just stating that these printed catch-all messages don’t prepare you for the real depressingly low slumps in…

May 1, 2015

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Poo-Poo Monkey

You know…the unfair thing about playing with kids is…well, it’s unfair. You enter into the game like any other – thinking it will be a level playing field (because that’s how games should be right?!) but you quickly find it will be anything but. Like today I was instructed I was a “Poo-Poo Monkey” that was running…

April 20, 2015

Comedy Capers
Pee, and Pornography

I was chatting with a friend just the other day over dinner, when she told me a story of how she had endured a horrendous flight littered with visa complications – and vigorous crosschecks! Just my kinda story, right?! Anyway this led me to tell her of my last flight…which I think I didn’t share…

April 4, 2015

Comedy Capers
Peed my Pants.

Let me vent about a horrible little BASTARD at my work-place…this piece of shit, urghhhh – look alright, I’m sorry and everything, but this simply has to be said. I can’t put it off any longer, and I can’t let this kind of behaviour slide for one second more! I just can’t let it pass! After all, if I…

March 25, 2015

Comedy Capers
Go Compare…

I don’t know what it is…but I can’t help it – it’s hard to resist…and the easy access makes it all the more simple – and therefore all the more difficult to avoid… I’m talking about comparisons. What did you think I was talking about? Anyway….yeah, it’s like an addiction of sorts – fuelled by the little…

March 8, 2015

Musings
Ghostbusters: Reboot

First sneak peek of the new Ghostbusters reboot! Looks like they took things a different way this time around… www.facebook.coms/storytimewithjohn www.youtube.com/storytimewithjohn101 Please buy my collection of stories! Get it in paperback here – or on Kindle here! ALL proceeds go towards Macmillan Cancer Support!

February 27, 2015

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Treasure Your Kids! (Haemorrhoids)

I get a bit sappy on this one…also, erm…haemorrhoids. Apologies. www.facebook.com/storytimewithjohn www.youtube.com/storytimewithjohn101 Please buy my collection of stories! Get it in paperback here – or on Kindle here! ALL proceeds go towards Macmillan Cancer Support!

February 12, 2015

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